I am now officially booked:)
New year, new status, new life, hope all to be better InsyaAllah
Hehe will write more:)
xoxo
Friday, December 28, 2012
Thursday, November 29, 2012
This Much
Today I'm back after one day having an MC.
Masuk je opis terus dikejar kerja.
Stress.
Stress.
Perasaan tak enak, rasa nak marah je.
Benci dan annoyed dengan leaders yang bangga sangat bercerai disebabkan dia dan prinsipnya-KERJA.
Benci bila orang define "success" tu dengan bilangan A atau CGPA 4 flat atau study overseas.
Benci tahu tak? Benci bila kau pakai tudung siti macam tu.
Benci.
Sakit hati.
Aih, emonya!
Dan kini aku rasa March itu masih jauh:(
Mungkin sebetulnya aku benci Bintulu, benci sangat.
This much *sepemeluk*.
Bye
Masuk je opis terus dikejar kerja.
Stress.
Stress.
Perasaan tak enak, rasa nak marah je.
Benci dan annoyed dengan leaders yang bangga sangat bercerai disebabkan dia dan prinsipnya-KERJA.
Benci bila orang define "success" tu dengan bilangan A atau CGPA 4 flat atau study overseas.
Benci tahu tak? Benci bila kau pakai tudung siti macam tu.
Benci.
Sakit hati.
Aih, emonya!
Dan kini aku rasa March itu masih jauh:(
Mungkin sebetulnya aku benci Bintulu, benci sangat.
This much *sepemeluk*.
Bye
Thursday, November 22, 2012
Erti Memiliki
Dalam hidup ni, aku belajar; lagi banyak kita memiliki, lagi banyak kita akan rasa kehilangan.
Saat pertama kali hilang, pedih dan sakit.
Bila dah dimakan waktu, hati kembali pulih.
Barang kesayangan yg aku beli di Sheffield dulu, ada yg hilang diambil orang.
Nak marah lebih-lebih, tiada guna pun.
Sekarang ni, aku cuma perlu fokus hari-hari mendatang.
Siapa sangka, relationship yang terhalang dulu kini mudah semua.
Rasa lega.
Ibunya menunggu-nunggu untuk mendengar plan anak lelakinya.
Tentatively rombongan akan datang next month.
Cincin belum cari, tiket nak balik KL mahal pulak.
Boss pulak nak aku pegi Singapore next month.
Sesungguhnya Disember yang sibuk, I reckon.
So now I wonder gadis-gadis yg begitu BANYAK MASA nak DIY preparation kawen mereka.
Like, serius derang ada masa?
Hurm , unlike me. Satu barang pun belum siap.
haha
Moga semuanya dimudahkan.
:)
Saat pertama kali hilang, pedih dan sakit.
Bila dah dimakan waktu, hati kembali pulih.
Barang kesayangan yg aku beli di Sheffield dulu, ada yg hilang diambil orang.
Nak marah lebih-lebih, tiada guna pun.
Sekarang ni, aku cuma perlu fokus hari-hari mendatang.
Siapa sangka, relationship yang terhalang dulu kini mudah semua.
Rasa lega.
Ibunya menunggu-nunggu untuk mendengar plan anak lelakinya.
Tentatively rombongan akan datang next month.
Cincin belum cari, tiket nak balik KL mahal pulak.
Boss pulak nak aku pegi Singapore next month.
Sesungguhnya Disember yang sibuk, I reckon.
So now I wonder gadis-gadis yg begitu BANYAK MASA nak DIY preparation kawen mereka.
Like, serius derang ada masa?
Hurm , unlike me. Satu barang pun belum siap.
haha
Moga semuanya dimudahkan.
:)
Sunday, October 21, 2012
Perihal Manja
Hari ni aku ke Miri berniat nak beli eyeshadow Elianto. Aku suka shimmer effect pada eyeshadownya, harga pun average, affordable. Nyums!
Rupanya Elianto dah tutup di Bintang Megamall. Frust, makanya terus aku tapau McD. Maklumlah Bintulu takde McD.
Oklah all, actually aku nak cerita benda lain.
Aku ke Miri dengan seorang kawan perempuan.
Dia ada kawan di Miri, so we met up.
Aku, kawan aku, rakan kawan aku (H, bukan nama betul) dan suami H.
Rupanya H ni rapat dengan kawan aku ni, siap main cubit-cubit pipi bila berbual.
Suami H tengok saja sambil senyum.
So?
Apa point aku?
Point aku ialah, senario begitu buat aku terfikir, seingat aku lah, aku tak pernah terbabit dalam scene begitu dengan rakan perempuanku.
Mungkin aku bukan manja type, bukan lemah lembut type or aku tak reti mcm tu.
Sampai sekarang aku terfikir kenapa aku tak pernah buat macam tu.
Lepas ni boleh try kot.
Haha.
**Point aku untuk diri sendiri; tolong lah lebih sabar ok.**
Rupanya Elianto dah tutup di Bintang Megamall. Frust, makanya terus aku tapau McD. Maklumlah Bintulu takde McD.
Oklah all, actually aku nak cerita benda lain.
Aku ke Miri dengan seorang kawan perempuan.
Dia ada kawan di Miri, so we met up.
Aku, kawan aku, rakan kawan aku (H, bukan nama betul) dan suami H.
Rupanya H ni rapat dengan kawan aku ni, siap main cubit-cubit pipi bila berbual.
Suami H tengok saja sambil senyum.
So?
Apa point aku?
Point aku ialah, senario begitu buat aku terfikir, seingat aku lah, aku tak pernah terbabit dalam scene begitu dengan rakan perempuanku.
Mungkin aku bukan manja type, bukan lemah lembut type or aku tak reti mcm tu.
Sampai sekarang aku terfikir kenapa aku tak pernah buat macam tu.
Lepas ni boleh try kot.
Haha.
**Point aku untuk diri sendiri; tolong lah lebih sabar ok.**
Sunday, October 14, 2012
My Room, A Hotel Room
I'm not sure this is due to 'Bintulu factor' or not but I have plenty of time thinking about myself, including my room.
Since early 2012, I have been thinking of how to turn my room into something more homey.
I started to change my curtain and bought new set of bedsheets.
Bought room spray from Body Shop too. Table lamp is for more dimmed lighting and romantic mode. *Eleh sorang-sorang pun nak romantic mode haha*. Best apa, nak tidur pun senang:)
Next, I got myself an LCD TV, FULL HD ok. Haha. I bought it somewhere in February this year, around chinese new year.
LG brand, cost me around RM999. Ada sale, okla la kan although he was strongly disagree and cakap I wasted my money. Haha.
Next, I beli aircond pulak sebab I couldnt stand the rising temperature somewhere in June-July. Konon-konon summer season lah kan, tableybelah.
Yelah mengada kan tak tahan panas but seriously tak tahan until I couldnt sleep. Nak tidur siang on weekends pn tak senang:P
Bila ada TV tapi takde astro pun tak complete kan. Finally I installed astro pula, complete dah I rasa.
Alhamdulillah I love my room. :) Rasa macam hote mini gitu. Heuehuehue.
On the other hand, I love my Sunday tapi sayang Ahadku makin habis.
Woke up as early as 6am, performed subuh and no more sleep. Irite mmediately went out searched for breakfast and got myself nasi lemak, pisang goreng panas and made a cup of hot milo.
What a morning:).
Then off to office settlekan kerja sikit for tomorrow's discussion with my boss.
Next went to the mall, beli barang sikit and balik rumah.
Watched tv sepanjang petang and fell asleep, bangun-bangun terus mandi and here I am, fresh and wangi. Haha I like ..:)
Ok people, I will write more.
Love, Z
Since early 2012, I have been thinking of how to turn my room into something more homey.
I started to change my curtain and bought new set of bedsheets.
Bought room spray from Body Shop too. Table lamp is for more dimmed lighting and romantic mode. *Eleh sorang-sorang pun nak romantic mode haha*. Best apa, nak tidur pun senang:)
Next, I got myself an LCD TV, FULL HD ok. Haha. I bought it somewhere in February this year, around chinese new year.
LG brand, cost me around RM999. Ada sale, okla la kan although he was strongly disagree and cakap I wasted my money. Haha.
Next, I beli aircond pulak sebab I couldnt stand the rising temperature somewhere in June-July. Konon-konon summer season lah kan, tableybelah.
Yelah mengada kan tak tahan panas but seriously tak tahan until I couldnt sleep. Nak tidur siang on weekends pn tak senang:P
Bila ada TV tapi takde astro pun tak complete kan. Finally I installed astro pula, complete dah I rasa.
Alhamdulillah I love my room. :) Rasa macam hote mini gitu. Heuehuehue.
On the other hand, I love my Sunday tapi sayang Ahadku makin habis.
Woke up as early as 6am, performed subuh and no more sleep. Irite mmediately went out searched for breakfast and got myself nasi lemak, pisang goreng panas and made a cup of hot milo.
What a morning:).
Then off to office settlekan kerja sikit for tomorrow's discussion with my boss.
Next went to the mall, beli barang sikit and balik rumah.
Watched tv sepanjang petang and fell asleep, bangun-bangun terus mandi and here I am, fresh and wangi. Haha I like ..:)
Ok people, I will write more.
Love, Z
Tuesday, October 9, 2012
You Know, This Is Life
You see, life is all about ups and downs. Recently I'm pretty much worried and occupied with work.
At the same time also need to think about my risik and nikah day.
Macam tak percaya, but his parents are on their way to have a discussion with the family members for a bertandang to my house.
Mostly to discuss about our nikah day which I tentatively put it in December 2012. Exact date? Not confirmed yet.
I started to have the panic attack. I surveyed the nikah dresses, what to wear, how much to spend, which photographer, make up nak yg camner, semua I tak boleh nak properly arrange in mind.
Luckily we both already had our checklist for the budget.
Bintulu memang takde choice langsung I tell you, baju tak cantik, mahal and limited of choice.
Makanya terpaksa lah I balik malaya nak pilih baju ke ape?
I berangan nak order kain dari India for its crepe and chiffon, tapi tak tahu lah sempat ke tak nak order kat kawan I tu.
Anyways, speaking of work life, I just had my HORROR TECHNICAL ASSESSMENT.
It was dramatic I should say and I didn't do well, I did just average.
Sigh macam mana nak naik pangkat secara pantas ni?
Takpe I try harder next year.
Nanti I write more ok. Lately susah nak log in to blogspot as I forgot my blogspot email (harr harr harr),..:P
At the same time also need to think about my risik and nikah day.
Macam tak percaya, but his parents are on their way to have a discussion with the family members for a bertandang to my house.
Mostly to discuss about our nikah day which I tentatively put it in December 2012. Exact date? Not confirmed yet.
I started to have the panic attack. I surveyed the nikah dresses, what to wear, how much to spend, which photographer, make up nak yg camner, semua I tak boleh nak properly arrange in mind.
Luckily we both already had our checklist for the budget.
Bintulu memang takde choice langsung I tell you, baju tak cantik, mahal and limited of choice.
Makanya terpaksa lah I balik malaya nak pilih baju ke ape?
I berangan nak order kain dari India for its crepe and chiffon, tapi tak tahu lah sempat ke tak nak order kat kawan I tu.
Anyways, speaking of work life, I just had my HORROR TECHNICAL ASSESSMENT.
It was dramatic I should say and I didn't do well, I did just average.
Sigh macam mana nak naik pangkat secara pantas ni?
Takpe I try harder next year.
Nanti I write more ok. Lately susah nak log in to blogspot as I forgot my blogspot email (harr harr harr),..:P
Sunday, September 9, 2012
Light At The End of The Tunnel
Kisah sedih, biar saya simpan. Bila buka blog, tak mahu lagi baca entri sedih tu. Saya saved as draft. Doakan jodoh kami dimudahkan, I have no reason to let him go for good.
We are still trying, pray for us please.
We believe there's a light at the end of the tunnel.
Thank you:)
We are still trying, pray for us please.
We believe there's a light at the end of the tunnel.
Thank you:)
Sunday, September 2, 2012
Perihal Nikah Kahwin
"Usahlah menikahi orang yang kita tidak sukai meskipun ia kerana Allah.
Alasannya dalam Islam sendiri menggariskan beberapa ciri wanita atau
lelaki yang tidak layak dijadikan pasangan hidup. Selain itu kita diberi
hak untuk memilih, bukan dipaksa untuk menikahi sesiapa sahaja yang
dihantar kepada kita."
Saturday, September 1, 2012
Thursday, July 19, 2012
Dan Jika Tiba Masa Itu..
Tadi saya terbayang sesuatu perkara.
Andai saya sekarang ini bersuami, bagaimana agaknya saya?
Kalau dulu, mungkin saya suka berangan perkara enak, bahagia dan ketawa saja.
No, marriage is more than that.
Marriage is the beginning of a new life. A new phase.
Some people berhijrah selepas kahwin. Dulu maybe dia free hair, smoking, liar. Tapi bila dah kahwin, she amazingly has changed.
This is a true story. I have known a woman I described above. She's a friend back in the UK.
Alhamdulillah, she is way better now and happily married.
Ok, back to my point.
Kalau dulu saya fikir seronok saja untuk kahwin, tapi permah tak you all fikir saat susah ketika kahwin?
Contohnnya jika suami saya jatuh sakit? Agaknya apa saya buat ya?
Makanya malam ni, saya sempat berfikir apa nak buat.
Masa tu, saya tahu Allah saja dapat tolong, Allah lah tempat saya bergantung harap sepenuhnya.
Undeniably, family and friends are there too. But Allah has it all, He is the enabler.
Makanya saya fikir, di saat suami saya tidak larat itu, saya akan bacakan dia Al Quran, baringkan dia di ribaan saya yang masih berkhudrat ini.
Itu saja saya mampu, selain beri dia ubat dan makan.
That is one of the sweetest things a wife should do this the husband.
Just sharing.
Take care people.
Andai saya sekarang ini bersuami, bagaimana agaknya saya?
Kalau dulu, mungkin saya suka berangan perkara enak, bahagia dan ketawa saja.
No, marriage is more than that.
Marriage is the beginning of a new life. A new phase.
Some people berhijrah selepas kahwin. Dulu maybe dia free hair, smoking, liar. Tapi bila dah kahwin, she amazingly has changed.
This is a true story. I have known a woman I described above. She's a friend back in the UK.
Alhamdulillah, she is way better now and happily married.
Ok, back to my point.
Kalau dulu saya fikir seronok saja untuk kahwin, tapi permah tak you all fikir saat susah ketika kahwin?
Contohnnya jika suami saya jatuh sakit? Agaknya apa saya buat ya?
Makanya malam ni, saya sempat berfikir apa nak buat.
Masa tu, saya tahu Allah saja dapat tolong, Allah lah tempat saya bergantung harap sepenuhnya.
Undeniably, family and friends are there too. But Allah has it all, He is the enabler.
Makanya saya fikir, di saat suami saya tidak larat itu, saya akan bacakan dia Al Quran, baringkan dia di ribaan saya yang masih berkhudrat ini.
Itu saja saya mampu, selain beri dia ubat dan makan.
That is one of the sweetest things a wife should do this the husband.
Just sharing.
Take care people.
Pemilik Hati
Allah pegang hati kita, Allah yg membolak-balikkan hati.
Tapi sekenal saya tentang diri sendiri, hati saya ni keras at times. tapi bila tersentuh, lembut, luluh dan tak siapa dapat ubah lagi.
Malam ini ada sesuatu yg menyentuh, saya menangis lebih dari biasa. Bukan sebab putusnya saya dan dia, tapi lebih dari itu.
Betapa saya sebenarnya begitu rindu saya yang baik, saya yang lembut hatinya, saya yang begitu sabar, saya yg tak sia-siakan peluang, saya yg menghargai.
Saya sedih sebab saya ini begitu hancur hati bila hilang seorang yg belum tentu milik saya, sedangkan manusia lain lebih susah hidupnya.
Ramai yg makan pun tak cukup, rumah pun sehelai sepinggang.
Sorry, tak reti nak describe rumah yang daif.
Maybe I was too focused on my personal life these days.
Maybe I was a little bit drifted from being right.
Saya ada dengar ustaz cakap, manusia ni, kalau dia baik, boleh melebihi malaikat.
Sebab tu, iman kita ni bukan constant pun, hatta yang belajar agama.
Maksud saya, semua org akan teruji imannya. Iman itu kan turun naik? Naiknya dengan amalan baik, turunnya dengan dosa kita sendiri.
Saya tak mahu bercakap banyak, cumanya mahu welcome the Ramadhan.
Saya pohon keberkatan di bulan mulia ni.
:)
Goodnight.
Tapi sekenal saya tentang diri sendiri, hati saya ni keras at times. tapi bila tersentuh, lembut, luluh dan tak siapa dapat ubah lagi.
Malam ini ada sesuatu yg menyentuh, saya menangis lebih dari biasa. Bukan sebab putusnya saya dan dia, tapi lebih dari itu.
Betapa saya sebenarnya begitu rindu saya yang baik, saya yang lembut hatinya, saya yang begitu sabar, saya yg tak sia-siakan peluang, saya yg menghargai.
Saya sedih sebab saya ini begitu hancur hati bila hilang seorang yg belum tentu milik saya, sedangkan manusia lain lebih susah hidupnya.
Ramai yg makan pun tak cukup, rumah pun sehelai sepinggang.
Sorry, tak reti nak describe rumah yang daif.
Maybe I was too focused on my personal life these days.
Maybe I was a little bit drifted from being right.
Saya ada dengar ustaz cakap, manusia ni, kalau dia baik, boleh melebihi malaikat.
Sebab tu, iman kita ni bukan constant pun, hatta yang belajar agama.
Maksud saya, semua org akan teruji imannya. Iman itu kan turun naik? Naiknya dengan amalan baik, turunnya dengan dosa kita sendiri.
Saya tak mahu bercakap banyak, cumanya mahu welcome the Ramadhan.
Saya pohon keberkatan di bulan mulia ni.
:)
Goodnight.
Monday, July 16, 2012
We Live With Memories
I promised you readers that I will post happy tunes but life gets harder these days. The same case happened and I guess not lucky enough in relationships. Yes it hurts so bad that I cried three times yesterday. It's sad to know that all this while I've been living with disapproval and uncertainties. Also, I have been waiting for miracles to happen. No, no miracles and nothing is new. He blamed me for being impatient and emotional but he might have forgotten that this woman was waiting so patiently and kept holding on to the long distance despite the disapproval. This time I cant take it anymore. Let it be, let it end so that I can move on. Im just not a favourite, well that pains me. I called it off and I pray for a strength for this. This pain i cant bear anymore. You're the guy I have loved and I will cherish the memories we had. At least all those are worth remembering. If I miss you, I still keep our things. I might cry for days but that's it. You take care.
If we're meant to be, I accept it as my jodoh but I'm not gona try to make things work.
Thursday, July 12, 2012
Oh Dear!
homaigod homaigod. (nada sedikit gedik).
Life has been a little bit unwell, mainly work-related.
Shutdown. Shutdown.
Yesterday, pecah rekod ever, I worked for 15 hrs! Gila ok, hari ni dengan jayanya saya bergegas pulang awal sekitar jam 730pm.
Makanya terus ke kedai beli barang-barang peribadi sambil menikmati angin malam Bintulu.
Hello world, well in case you have been missing me.
Apart from work, I dont have much to say as I haven't seen my friends for quite long now.
Ish ish ish no more chit chatting and lepak time.
But I would like to share with you some pixels I took during my day out with family last 2 weeks
Life has been a little bit unwell, mainly work-related.
Shutdown. Shutdown.
Yesterday, pecah rekod ever, I worked for 15 hrs! Gila ok, hari ni dengan jayanya saya bergegas pulang awal sekitar jam 730pm.
Makanya terus ke kedai beli barang-barang peribadi sambil menikmati angin malam Bintulu.
Hello world, well in case you have been missing me.
Apart from work, I dont have much to say as I haven't seen my friends for quite long now.
Ish ish ish no more chit chatting and lepak time.
But I would like to share with you some pixels I took during my day out with family last 2 weeks
Sunday, June 24, 2012
Well, That's Just It
People, Im back after a few weeks I left my blog.
Life is fairly smooth.
Work? Im not as ambitious as my boss thought I am.
Personal?
Well, in personal life I learnt that;
"It's hard to ignore people that care about us. The messages that keep coming, the calls that ring your phone, the thoughts, the care, the love, all, everything. Hard to ignore."
I will wait until everything worth the moments.
Ok people, I'm not feeling well tonight, will talk more.
Lots of love,
Z
Saturday, June 9, 2012
Happy Tunes
No people, bukan Tune Hotel di sini. haha.
Oklah, malam ni saya baca kembali post yang lama-lama.
Ada banyak juga yg berunsur melankoli. Post yg berunsur macam tu, bila baca balik, tak lah berapa seronok.
Rasa gloomy dunia.
Mulai hari ini, I'll try my best to write happy thoughts, only happy tunes.
People, tomorrow I'll be attending a Sarawakian's wedding.
hi hi hi.
Now let's have my beautiful sleep.
Nyte!
Oklah, malam ni saya baca kembali post yang lama-lama.
Ada banyak juga yg berunsur melankoli. Post yg berunsur macam tu, bila baca balik, tak lah berapa seronok.
Rasa gloomy dunia.
Mulai hari ini, I'll try my best to write happy thoughts, only happy tunes.
People, tomorrow I'll be attending a Sarawakian's wedding.
hi hi hi.
Now let's have my beautiful sleep.
Nyte!
Tuesday, June 5, 2012
Rungutan Si Patah Hati
Down, down down sangat hari ni.
Di office kerja berjalan lancar until I got an email, from my landlady that she'll be increasing the house rent from RM900 to RM1500.
Yes, that was ridiculous kan? The increment was too dramatic.
I tried to nego to get RM1.1k but managed to get RM1.3k je.
Cmon kakak, rumah you rumah lama, lagipun rumah area saya ni normally around RM1k to RM1.1k max. I know Bintulu houses are freaking expensive, tak padan dengan kampung. Harga macam KL, sila lah tahu. Terus rasa down, terus tak sabar nak balik rumah dan memang saya menangis. Hati rasa pecah sebabnya saya rasa pointless sudah stay di Sarawak ni. Kenapa?
1) Rumah mahal, double storey min RM370k. Normally all the agents akan beli dulu dari developer, then baru dijual to public. Makanya all people here beli rumah secara 'subsale', explains why mahal.
2) condo/apartment lagi mahal. Kerajaan tak kawal harga condo di sini, sebaliknya broker. Ada condo tgh naik, harga minimum is RM836k, dua bilik. Bayangkan mahal dia..
3) Drivers sini banyak yg bodoh sombong, ada juga yg gangster sebab drive 4wd. Hilux, etc. Annoying dan menguji sabar.
4) Jauh dari family, maklumlah terpisah laut china selatan.
5) Flight tiket mahal, esp kalau balik last minute atau emergency. Pengsan. Sebab tu tinggal di Bintulu requires GOOD PLANNING.
Cmon kakak, rumah you rumah lama, lagipun rumah area saya ni normally around RM1k to RM1.1k max. I know Bintulu houses are freaking expensive, tak padan dengan kampung. Harga macam KL, sila lah tahu. Terus rasa down, terus tak sabar nak balik rumah dan memang saya menangis. Hati rasa pecah sebabnya saya rasa pointless sudah stay di Sarawak ni. Kenapa?
1) Rumah mahal, double storey min RM370k. Normally all the agents akan beli dulu dari developer, then baru dijual to public. Makanya all people here beli rumah secara 'subsale', explains why mahal.
2) condo/apartment lagi mahal. Kerajaan tak kawal harga condo di sini, sebaliknya broker. Ada condo tgh naik, harga minimum is RM836k, dua bilik. Bayangkan mahal dia..
3) Drivers sini banyak yg bodoh sombong, ada juga yg gangster sebab drive 4wd. Hilux, etc. Annoying dan menguji sabar.
4) Jauh dari family, maklumlah terpisah laut china selatan.
5) Flight tiket mahal, esp kalau balik last minute atau emergency. Pengsan. Sebab tu tinggal di Bintulu requires GOOD PLANNING.
Monday, June 4, 2012
Cuti Tambahan
Salam, seronok ada cuti tambahan.
Usai bangun pagi baru sedar badan tak sihat mana. Tidur awal semalam keletihan travel kl-btulu.
Lepas mandi dan bersiap, terus keluar sarapan dan menuju ke mall utk format laptop.
Agak teruja kerana laptop saya tu tak pernah dihantar ke 'klinik'.
Sekarang tunggu kereta dicuci, under bright sunny day.
Ok people, I'm just killing time while waiting for my car to be washed.
Dont fancy writing on a small screen.
Lots of love,
Z
Sunday, May 20, 2012
Out Of the Blue
Out of the blue, I miss Sheffield, I miss England, I miss the memories, I miss the bitter-sweet memories.
Y'know, it has been ages since I last updated anything here.
I miss some parts of me.
I really do.
Y'know, it has been ages since I last updated anything here.
I miss some parts of me.
I really do.
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